Why have I become so selfish lately?
It feels like all the evil desires that I thought I was delivered from, seems to be reviving in within me, and I am even returning back to the bad relationships that the word of God says clearly that I shouldn't be entertaining. I mean, what is wrong with me?
Remember beloved, that the closer God gets to you, the worse you become towards his requirements,
David says in Psalm 51:4; against you, you only, have I sinned and done this evil in you sight that you may be found just when you speak and blameless when you judge.
Most of the people think that it's bad people that do evil things, yet when evil dwells in within the physical body of every woman and man on Earth. When people do evil things like killing, committing adultery, hatred etc……., they do it out of their physical natural ability (the strong desire to fulfill the will of the flesh) but when people do godly things like, sharing , giving, loving and treating others people good etc…… This means that it's God's supernatural grace that enables them to be and to behave in this manner, no matter if they believe in God or not,
Now, when people become so evil, this also means that God has taken a way His super natural grace that enables them to be good, so that they may fulfill their evil nature or desires, until they come into a place where they are willing to submit under God's will, where they acknowledge Him as God and totally depending on his grace for their existence, Let me ask you a question, A swine like character and a good character, which character is closer to God?
When it becomes so easy for human beings to be good and to do good, then this means that they get a tendency of taking God for granted and forsaking his ways (being obedient to His word), But when they start to become so evil (with a swine like character) this also reveals their need for God, which means that they are now closer to Him, even closer than a person who is morally good.
The evil nature in within people's characteristics brings them in contact with the empty part of their soul, that can only be fulfilled by God's instructions and obedience towards His word in their lives. There are so many fake drinks that people drink to quench their thirsty, but when you have been in a desert without water for three straight days, the only drink you are going to desire to quench your thirsty will be a cup of water,
Now, when you become so evil (doing all the things that the bible calls an abomination) so that you can not turn to any other small god (things that distract your relationship with God) for help, that is when you are willing to do what it takes to purchase and pursue after righteousness, Because how can you ever desire to be righteous when you have never experienced what evil is, or how can you appreciate your freedom status when you have never been under the bondage of slavery?
The evil nature in you will give birth to the desire of willing to trust and depend on God for every thing that you need concerning your life.